coffeeking: (autopsy bay)
Ianto Jones ([personal profile] coffeeking) wrote in [community profile] ataraxionlogs2014-04-28 10:42 am

(no subject)

CHARACTERS: Ianto Jones, OPEN
LOCATION: The Gardens
WARNINGS: Minor depictions of PTSD and Stockholm Syndrome, mentions of physical and mental abuse, cannibalism and body horror
SUMMARY: Ianto is back on the TQ, only a little worse for wear physically after the rescue team stormed Melkor's base. Now he has to work through the mental and emotional aftermath.
NOTES: Responses may be from both Ianto and Jack. Former captives are especially welcome!


They've temporarily relocated to the gardens, he and Jack. On finally returning to the Tranquility, Ianto had surprised even himself by nearly panicking at the enclosed dimness of their quarters. He'd insisted on checking on Myfanwy in a way that had fooled absolutely no one, especially not Jack, and they'd headed to the gardens immediately. Ianto had needed the light, the open brightness.

His wrists and neck are still chafed and sore, bite marks having broken open the skin around his wrists where he'd tried to chew through his bonds. He'd refused to go to the medbay and have it all bandaged; he didn't need medical attention, not like the others did. Jack had ultimately insisted on bandaging it all himself and Ianto had acquiesced.

He keeps close to Jack at all times, partially out of an unspoken fear that they'll be forcefully parted again, partially because he knows Jack can't be as alright as he's pretending to be, not after what Melkor did to him.

And that, he thinks, is his fault too. A lot of things are his fault. The worst of it is that there's some small part of him that feels bad for betraying Melkor. And that's crazy, it's some kind of bizarre misplaced sympathy, but knowing that doesn't help get rid of it.

As he recalls the almost crazed need he'd had to get back to the Tranquility, he wonders what else has been done to his mind.


CHARACTERS: Godric, Eric, Thranduil, Seraphim, generally OPEN to garden inhabitants
LOCATION: The Gardens
WARNINGS: Depictions and mentions of mental and emotional trauma
SUMMARY: Godric set out to rescue his progeny and his bonded from Melkor, and now they're back safely if not entirely alright. Torn between keeping an eye on both, he's brought Seraphim to the gardens to stay with them.
NOTES:


[A] Being torn between two bonds is something that can fray the nerves of even the strongest vampire. Eric would be his priority in most cases, but Eric is with Thranduil for now, something that gives him leave enough to focus on Seraphim.

Only after being assured that she's none the worse for wear does he go with her to collect some of her things, insisting that she remain close to him for now. She gives no protest, still shaken from her experience. Godric can feel it, the tremors along their bond less than they had been, but still not entirely settled. She likely won't be fully settled for some time yet.

[B] Once Godric is assured that Seraphim is settled nearby, he seeks out his child. Eric's emotional state has been battering him through their bond for so long that he itches to be near him, to take the pain and torment from him. Thranduil's presence is a boon, and a great comfort. He expects to find them together.
doesntdohumble: (sad eyes)

[personal profile] doesntdohumble 2014-04-30 05:08 am (UTC)(link)
Where anger sparks in Godric's eyes, Eric's own eyes are dull and full of the aching pain and shame instilled in them during his time spent with Morgoth. He knows that Godric felt all of the things that happened to him while he was kidnapped, but it is one thing to feel them and another entirely to experience them. To see those faces in the dark, of all the people he has loved and lost and failed, calling out to him and begging him to help when he cannot.

"...I have failed you, even so," he says, softly. He will not say how. He will not speak of what horrors Morgoth had made him relive, had caused him when he would not otherwise have experienced them. But as far as he's concerned, this is the truth. He was proud, once. And now, he is the hound.
faderbroderson: (firelight compliments my skin)

[personal profile] faderbroderson 2014-05-01 03:14 am (UTC)(link)
His anger fades a little in the face of this morose quality that Eric has never before shown. He has been less than happy at times, sad and upset, but this is something new. This is something that reminds him all too well of his own mind, the years before he met the sun. The idea chills him.

"How have you failed me? Tell me." Tell me so I may correct whatever lies he's instilled in you.
doesntdohumble: (crying head down)

[personal profile] doesntdohumble 2014-05-01 04:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Eric shakes his head. He can't entirely put it into words. He simply has this overwhelming sense that he doesn't deserve this. That he isn't worthy of Godric's love and affections. That he is terrible, he has done terrible things, he has failed to save himself and those he loved when it mattered - failed to save Godric in the end, and he knows that is no memory implanted by his captor. He just can't seem to get over the idea, that, well.

"...nothing has happened that I didn't deserve," he says, quietly. And therein lies the rub.
faderbroderson: (bitch i'll cut you)

[personal profile] faderbroderson 2014-05-02 09:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Godric speaks deliberately, firmly. He speaks as a maker who is demanding explanation from his child.

"You tell me you have failed me, but I cannot see how. Surely, as the failed party, I should be able to tell you exactly where you came up short, had you done such a thing. I can think of nothing. You say nothing happened that you did not deserve, and yet you've done nothing to my recollection to warrant the treatment you suffered. I find myself at a loss. Tell me, Eric. Explain to me what you have done to deserve such things. Tell me how you have failed me."
doesntdohumble: (looking up godric)

[personal profile] doesntdohumble 2014-05-03 03:06 am (UTC)(link)
Eric shakes his head again. "I don't know," he says, honestly. "It just... Feels that way. I feel..." He takes in a deep breath, letting it out slowly to try and keep the panic at bay. He doesn't feel himself. He doesn't know what he feels like. "He made me see things that weren't there. People that weren't there." He bites his tongue, before looking to Godric again, confusion in his eyes. "I do not know, Godric," he says, speaking in the old tongue, and it is clear that he means it. As a child, speaking to his maker, and being utterly lost in his own mind as he does.