charles xavier. (
forgodssake) wrote in
ataraxionlogs2014-07-12 03:04 pm
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oo6. closedish.
CHARACTERS: Charles Xavier and Severus Snape; Remus Lupin; Emma Swan; Nuala; Rogue; Johanna Mason; Odessa Knutson; Erik Lehnsherr; Captain Hook (Killian Jones); Hank McCoy; Raven Darkholme; Cassandra Anderson, others as they happen.
LOCATION: Level fourteen, room one hundred; laundry facilities; bar on level fourteen; kitchen on level fourteen; the Gardens; media library; level twenty, room one-hundred and ninety two; others as they happen.
WARNINGS: TBA.
SUMMARY: Adjusting to being a different person is a struggle.
NOTES: This is only partially closed. I'm using this as a forum for people to poke him, as random run ins may happen as I tag out instead. Please let me know if you'd like to do anything, and I'll be happy to set up a thread (unless you're feel ambitious).
to ever spend my life sitting playing future games
LOCATION: Level fourteen, room one hundred; laundry facilities; bar on level fourteen; kitchen on level fourteen; the Gardens; media library; level twenty, room one-hundred and ninety two; others as they happen.
WARNINGS: TBA.
SUMMARY: Adjusting to being a different person is a struggle.
NOTES: This is only partially closed. I'm using this as a forum for people to poke him, as random run ins may happen as I tag out instead. Please let me know if you'd like to do anything, and I'll be happy to set up a thread (unless you're feel ambitious).
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As is they’re encased in beard, which Erik is forced to endure at uncomfortably close range. It bristles at him, gingery and homeless: begging for judgment that’s only too easy to lapse into in the absence of context. ]
Live with what, [ is distant, as challenges go. Not interested. His eyes are on Charles’ scruffy chin. ]
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Is this the part where you pretend you don't know exactly what I'm talking about.
[ His hand loosens, fractionally, only because keeping that kind of grip gets uncomfortable after a while. ]
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Now it’s a silent challenge, his elbow rigid in support of Charles’ shifting weight.
Finish the accusation. ]
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This whole room denotes a difference; Erik has been in his rooms prior to now enough. Familiarly cluttered, but in negligence rather than absent mindedness. There is the smell of smoke that ventilation hasn't removed entirely, which had only been a rare trace, once, and didn't involve a tea cup as an ashtray he's improvised with on his bed stand.
Probably, there are rooms that are more miserable than this one. And people seem to get angry at him in it a lot. ]
Ten years. [ A push comes with letting Erik's arm go, although it does more to lever himself away rather than shove the other man back. ] That's how long. You left me, and took her with you.
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Erik is unmoved.
There is nothing in his expression to denote skepticism, save perhaps the utter absence of guilt or apology. Charles pushes off of his arm and Erik watches him go, still about the eyes until he resolves to turn mechanically back for the third drawer. ]
So you gave up.
I didn’t ‘take’ anyone, [ he says, secure in his recollection of events that are still recent, for him. ] She chose to join me.
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He watches the other man's turned back, flinty anger mute and vaguely helpless to find a good enough avenue of release. ]
Yeah, for the whole year you spent together, before you got caught.
[ --is a little abruptly meaner, bitterness curdled in his tone, unhappy that Erik was caught, unhappy with what Erik did to get caught, unhappy with the whole sorry mess. His gaze lists to the drawer being opened. ]
The serum's a treatment for my spine.
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It doesn’t matter.
He collects the papers one at a time, knuckles hard and grip unforgiving. There’s quite a bit of rustling. ]
Then you no longer have need of it.
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[ This isn't particularly cutting, designed to distract. Flatly delivered as fact. There's been a slight head tip along with wondering if Erik was going to ask something
and then he doesn't, and Charles stays rooted to the spot. Watching a point between the other man's shoulders. ]
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His spine is straight, posture casually sharp as Charles remembers. There’s poise in the broad set of his shoulders and the point of one shoe. Even the lines in his back are handsome. ]
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[ Is to fight about it, probably. But anger at its best gives energy. Anger at its worst carves out the kind of hollowness that seems to have dried out Charles' tone in smoke and disuse. ]
Is for you to leave.
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What sort of treatment.
[ If he intended to leave he would have knocked. ]
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[ --comes with a sort of disbelieving, breathy laugh that doesn't do much to take away from his mood. Which is a lot of things.
Uncharacteristically distrustful. Paranoid, defensive. ]
What're you asking, Erik.
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He doesn’t answer immediately.
A pair of slow steps bring him closer, first. ]
I’m asking what was worth the loss of everything you are.
[ The papers are still in his right hand, variously creased and crimped by rough handling. Near enough for Charles to make out his own scrawl. ]
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Even if the corner of his mouth hooks up wry. ]
If you had've seen me--
[ He stops that train of thought. Better to answer the question, even if it's a shitty one, than risk his composure. ]
Mobility. Painlessness. The ability to think properly, to sleep properly, to function. Control. I already lost everything I was, Erik. So I took something back.
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Anger at him. Resentment. Blame.
After a hard moment spent engaged in a staring contest at close range, Erik breaks off first. He turns to go, papers and all, stride long and speed clipped. ]
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any response
better than that. A breath in seems to catch against his set teeth, held high in his chest. Comes out, then, as a harsh sounding laugh. The nerve!!
Fuckn-- ]
I'm not the only future disappointment.
[ --he tells turned back. And means it, lashing disdain that he doesn't mind gets on him just as much. ]
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He’s rooted to the floor just before the panel to open the door, tension stiff in his shoulders and carved hollow into his jaw. He hasn’t lifted a hand to it yet, knuckles dried all to tendon and bone around battered notes.
Violence is his specialty. ]
I never lied to you.
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I expected we'd change the world.
[ Leather rustles as he settles, skull resting back against wall, metal that isn't metal. The silence of an absence of minds is something he is still conscious of, in a way. ]
For the good. But you like it too much.
[ The tilting glance back scopes Erik up and down. ]
Killing.
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He stands like that a moment,
poised,
and clarifies: ] Killing humans.
[ An easy fan of his unclenched hand sheds papers onto the floor in a flush as he turns back.
Magnetism takes hold of the bed, coursing low through the frame on its way out into shoe shanks, zipper, and iron fillings.
The light in his eyes has switched to off. ]
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The look back over to Erik is sharper than before, cutting through the former, blurrier haze of indistinct anger.
And nothing. No commands in Erik's head, no vanishing trickery, no prying into skulls to read intentions. Charles doesn't know. He only ever thought he did, clearly. ]
Don't, [ is coarse through his teeth, more heat than tremor. ]
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Erik has only just now started for him, but the room is small: three strides and he’s there to haul the smaller man upright. Two more see his back nailed to the wall; Erik catches his free hand up under wiry neckbeard, around the throat. His fingers bind hard into tender skin there, crushing muscle and pipe together, further stemming oxygen to the brain where his thumb hooks to dig deep into the carotid's flow. ]
You’re one of them.
[ Defiance, if any, is met with a helpful bite of bony fingertips to bring eye contact around to bear by force.
There’s nothing else left that Charles needs to see. ]
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Struggle is indistinct but immediate, shoes scuffling against the ground as he's dragged up from it with a hiss of vocalised, vicious protest, but still sees back to wall, and hand at throat.
A fist thumps Erik's shoulder, but that's all; hands grasp and claw at arm, grip.
There's nothing else left to say, either, save for sick sounding choking gasps. His eyes are bright, saline-blurred, focused on Erik's face even as vision starts to get dark at the edges. The start of a nn-- is cut off with tighter fingers, while his own loosen fractionally. ]
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Powerless, [ he says, quiet and close.
Anger quivers into a show of his teeth -- frustration rough on his breath. ]
I never wanted to hurt you.
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Focus is sharp until it isn't, swimming and dull, unconsciousness like a dark hole beneath him. Slaps and thumps and struggles have slowed to nothing, his hands only gripping Erik's arm like it can save him just as much as it's holding him in place. ]
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He’s lost, for a moment.
There is the door. Those are the papers. ]
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